Guilt is the Mother of Invention
by KSchmidt
Summary: Serena's guilt leads her to take drastic measures. Will she allow the Scouts and Darien to help her heal? What is going on inside her head? Will any of this change the future? UPDATED: 10 APRIL 09
1. Don't Call Me Princess

Title: Guilt is the Mother of Invention (working title)

Author: KSchmidt

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"A guilty conscience is the mother of invention." –Carolyn Wells

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Prologue: Don't Call Me Princess 

_This should hurt. Why does this not hurt?_

"Because you have chosen so."

_Huh? What does that mean?_

"You know what it means. You have willed it to be so," the sage voice sighed. "Princess, you have trained and you have mastered all that you have attempted, including that was given to you as your birthright. This is evident in the ease in which you use your telepathy. Why do you question what you have accomplished?"

"Because it isn't enough. It will never be enough," her voice quietly resonated in the Temple room. With that said, she released the bloodstained shard of glass that had been embedded in her side. She padded inaudibly out of the Great Room.

_By the by, DON'T call me Princess. I am no Princess! You'd do best to remember that._

The sage voice chuckled. "My Lady, if you only realized how truly you have become the Princess you were destined to be." Then she too left the Great Room, thoughts of the reluctant royalty placed on hold for the moment.

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Hey y'all! This is my first real attempt at writing fanfiction, so be nice! ;) I'm also looking for a an editor, so if you're interested, send me a message. Alright, I also have to put in the standard "Please read and review." So, you guys know the drill. Love all! 

-Kat


	2. Let Go

I forgot to add the Disclaimer in the Prologue, so I'm putting it here. I disclaim that don't own Sailor Moon...blah,blah,blah...ecetera. You guys know what I mean. I make no money from this.

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Chapter One: Let Go 

Blood and water mixed as they traveled down her face. The gash on her side was now a thin red line running just above the curve of her hip. The cut she hadn't realized was on her brow was nothing more than a white line marring her angelic face. Her silver blonde hair was plastered to her alabaster skin.

"_You think you're gonna play hero, little girl?"_

She clutched her knees tighter to her chest, forcing her bruised back against the ice-cold, tiled wall. She gasped in pain and in memory.

"_You wanna be a hero? Well heroes make choices. Now choose, you or her?"_

Salty tears joined the blood and water in their journey down her toned body.

"_CHOOSE, Damn it! YOU or HER!"_

A silent sob escaped her façade as her memories assaulted her soul. Her cerulean eyes darkened to a stormy grey as she became lost in that moment.

"_You won't choose? Fine! I will."_

Beautiful eyes drifted shut.

"_I choose-"_

"Serena!"

Stormy grey eyes regressed to her natural blue as they snapped towards the door to her bath chamber.

"Serena, you're wasting water. Besides, it's time for dinner. You _are_ coming?"

Serena released a breathe she hadn't realized she was holding as she realized it was simply Isa. She let out a tiny sigh as she ceased the flow of water. Isa's question was more statement than it was a confirmation.

"Yes, Isa. I'm coming to dinner," Serena called out in reply to the older housewife.

Isa grunted her acknowledgement of Serena's response. Serena could hear her pad away from the door, but she knew Isa hadn't left the outer room.

With a slight shake of her head, Serena slipped on a cotton robe and exited her bath chamber. She was greeted with the sight of Isa, a slightly portly woman, sprawled across Serena's chaise.

"Those guys are gonna be the death of me," she exclaimed in mock exasperation.

Serena let a small giggle loose at the ebullient woman's antics. She moved behind a screen and slipped out of her robe. As she slipped on a pair of black linen pants that resided low on the curves of her hips, she heard Isa rise from the chaise.

"Susie says you had trouble in training today."

Serena could hear the unspoken question behind Isa's statement. _Why do you continue to doubt all that you are capable of?_ Serena sighed and slipped a black tank top over her head.

"What did the guys do this time, Isa?" Serena walked out from behind the screen to face the motherly woman who ran the manor, completely ignoring her statement about her training session.

"Serena," Isa started looking at the young woman she had come to see as a daughter, but at Serena's closed up expression she stopped. "Dinner will be ready in 10 minutes. You might want to hurry up before the guys get there."

Serena nodded her acquiesce. It was Isa's turn to sigh and she did as she turned to leave Serena's suite.

"Serena, I know it's hard, but it time to let go. You have learned all you can and you have mastered each aspect of your available power. Maybe it's time to go home."

Serena spun around, opening her mouth to argue that she was home. Isa put a hand up in a motion to silence her.

"I mean your true home. It's time for you to face them. You need to let them know what happened. You need to go to them so you can heal," once again Isa sighed and walked over to face the younger woman. She pulled the petite blonde into a motherly embrace. "Serena, you have become apart of my family, but _mi corazón_, you need to finish healing, and only those who you've run away from can do that. I know you'll never forget what happened, _mi amor_, but even the worst scars fade over time."

With that, Isa placed a gentle, motherly kiss on Serena's forehead. "_Después de la lluvia el sol brillará otra vez."_ And with that, the Hispanic housewife left Serena to her thoughts as she finished preparing for dinner.

* * *

Jedeite shook his short blonde hair out of his eyes as he leaned in closer to the three other males surrounding him. 

"When do you think she'll be ready?"

Nephrite lowered his chocolate eyes and heaved a sigh. "She keeps pushing herself harder and harder. I know she's powerful, but she isn't invincible."

Zoicite opened his mouth to contracdict Nephrite's assertion, but he was silenced by a glare from Kunzite's piercing jade eyes. Kunzite released Zoicite from his glare and turned to face Jedeite and Nephrite. He pulled himself up to his full stature and all three of his companions could see that he was going into leader-mode.

"You must remember that we are Generals and we obey ourPrincess' commands. Jed, you will know, as will she, when she is ready. Neph, you know the Princess. She is stubborn and will continue to push herself past her limits. You can do nothing but be there and make sure she does not injure herself too badly," Kunzite commanded his comrades as only a leader could. He dropped his shoulders and lost his proud posture. "Guys, this is Sere we're talking about. She's done so much for us, we need to stand by and give her the support she refuses to seek from the Senshi. The Princess-"

"Kunz, you know better than anyone else not to refer to me by that title," Serena quietly commanded. She had practically materialized behind Kunzite. It was one of her newly honed skills that the guys had yet to grow accustomed to. She could sneak up on anyone or anything without making any sound."I have not been a princess in over a thousand years. I am Serena Tsukino, a normal, average, eighteen year old. Do not make me tell you again." At the looks on the generals' faces, Serena relaxed her glare into a cocky smile. "Besides, I'm not THAT stubborn."

The generals released chuckles at their Princess' proclaimation.

Kunzite wrapped an arm around the petite blonde and started leading her towards the dinner table. Isa had just finished setting out the last of the dinner dishes.

"This coming from the girl who would throw a tantrum to get her way?"

"Key word would be 'would.' I don't throw tantrums anymore. Now I just use my evil eye to get my way," Serena said, playfully pushing him away from her.

Zoicite rolled his eyes at Serena and Kunzite's antics. _He brings out the child in her. Which I suppose can be good considering...everything._

"Oh, I quiver in my boots?"

"Don't you mean 'booties,' Kunz?"

"Sere!"

"Kunz!" she mocked.

"Moon brat!"

"Love slave!"

"Low blow, Sere."

"Get over it!"

Nephrite and Jedeite followed slowly behind their three friends. Jedeite leaned over to whisper to Nephrite.

"I've been thinking about the Prince."

Nephrite sent Jedeite a questioning glance, "What about Endymion?"

"What do you think he's going to do when he realizes Sere's been with us all this time?"

"Dairen is going to kill us."

"That's what I was afraid of."

And with that, they both joined Serena, Zoicite, a pouting Kunzite, and Isa at the dinner table.

* * *

From the Great Room, Setsuna could fell their presences. She lowered her head and opened the portal to the Gates of Time. _It is time, Serenity._ She stepped through the portal and disappeared to the realm that knows no Time. 

At the table, Serena grew quiet and tilted her head in concentration. Something nagged at her mind, but she could not place the problem. She placed it at the back of her mind and turned her attention back to the dinner conversation. All she could catch involved Jedeite, a feather duster, and peanut butter. _I don't want to know._

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You know the drill! Read and review! Especially if you want to know what Isa said in Spanish. 

-Kat


	3. No More Hiding

Thanks to all of those who reviewed! I feel special! Haha! As for what Isa said, cardcaptor eternity, you were really close! For anyone who was curious, Isa said, "After the rain the sun will shine again." It's something a good friend of mine always says, so it was my dedication to her.

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Chapter 2: No More Hiding

Serena entered the Temple room inaudibly. Her cerulean eyes scanned every inch of the room not missing a single detail. Her sword was raised, poised, waiting for an attack. She continued her examination of the room before frustration encouraged her to reach out with her powers.

There was no one there.

_This isn't right. Where's Setsuna?_

Serena pondered where the wayward Guardian of Time could be, when it hit her. Guardian of Time. The nagging feeling from dinner yesterday flew to mind. The words that were originally blocked from her mind suddenly became clear. _It is time, Serenity._

"DAMN IT, PLUTO! I'M NOT READY!" she screamed to the goddess.

"_Yes, you are,_" Pluto's words whispered softly in her mind.

"_Be glad you're a goddess, Setsuna, or else your ass would be mine," _Serena growled in her mind, sending the thought directly to where she knew the Gaurdian was. Serena could almost hear Setsuna's chuckle.

Serena let out a frustrated yell, and her dagger was suddenly embedded in the far wall, barely an inch from where Kunzite's head was supporting the wall. His eyes widened as he turned to the jeweled weapon. His fellow generals looked on in amusement. It did not last long.

"Fight me," Serena all but growled out.

All four generals looked to their Princess in shock. They had only heard that tone of voice from her a handful of times, each time was against an enemy. Someone had royally pissed off their Princess, and she no longer embodied her name, for there was nothing serene about her right now.

"I said, FIGHT ME!"

The Generals jumped to action. They knew not hold back because she was their Princess or because she was a girl. They had learned first hand that not only would it piss her off more, but it would also earn you an even more brutal fight. You do not underestimate Serenity's skill and strength.

The Great Room was suddenly filled with the sounds of battle. Metal clashed against metal. You could hear flesh pounding against flesh. No powers were used, this was simply hand to hand combat. This continued for more than an hour, before every single General had dropped to the floor in pain and exhaustion.

Serena leaned against her sword for support. Though she could not feel the pain, she knew her ankle was sprained and could not hold her weight. She sighed in acceptance and frustration.

"Back your bags," she said quietly. She flicked her wrist, and the Generals could feel the pain and exhaustion leave their bodies. Jedeite leaned up on his elbows to meet his Princess' eyes. They were closed off, as was her mind, but in her aura he could see her fear, pain, and defeat.

"We leave in an hour." And with that, the tiny slip of girl, who had just handed the experienced generals their asses, left the Great Room.

Nephrite stood over his comrade. Jedeite's eyes had not left the doorway where their Princess had vanished through.

"Jed," he said softly, drawing Jedeite's attention. He offered up a helping hand, which Jedeite grasped. Nephrite helped lift him to his feet. "What did you see?"

At Nephrite's words, Kunzite and Zoicite halted in their preparations for their departure and glanced to their unusually silent friend.

"She still fears something," Jedeite's hushed tone rushed over those present. "She's scared, she's in pain, and she feels like she's been defeated before she's even started." His eyes glazed over as his psyche sought his Princess'. He was shocked by what he saw in his Princess' psyche. _She's hiding from...oh my goddess!_ He was abruptly brought back to his body as he encountered her barrier. "She is hiding from them," Jedeite realized. "She hides from the Senshi and...the Prince."

The psychic General's proclamation stunned them into silence. They knew Serena was in hiding, but they had assumed it was from the big evil of the time. In no way had they imagined that she was doing it because of her own personal guard. It was incomprehensible that she would hide from Endymion.

Kunzite was the first to recover from his shock. "Why?"

Jedeite turned to him helplessly, "I don't know and she's not going to let me know."

* * *

Serena could feel Jedeite begin to probe her psyche. Her previously constructed barrier had been destroyed in her anger and frustration. She quickly threw up another to avoid his gentle probing, but she knew he had seen what she had so carefully hidden. However, she could not worry about that now. Now, she had to focus on what she was going to do. Despite what Setsuna said, she still didn't feel ready. _And maybe I never will._

She heard Isa's soft knock on the door and turned to face the older woman. Serena recognized the look in Isa's eyes.

"I'm sorry, Isa," Serena whispered softly. Isa rushed over and swept the petite woman into her arms.

"Don't be sorry, _mi ángel_. It was meant to be this way," Isa attempted to console the young girl that had been left in her charge. Isa felt a slight tingle on her neck and knew it was time. "_Yo siempre estaré en el corazón, mi niña."_

Serena wrapped her arms tighter around the woman who became like a mother in the absence of both her own.

"I love you, Isa-_madre_," Serena whispered, beautiful eyes shut desperately. She released the shorter woman, but could not open her eyes. A slight breeze swirled around Serena softly, before everything became still once more. However, before it died, Serena could hear softly upon the breeze Isa's last words of advice.

"_El amor verdadero nunca morirá."_

Serena slowly opened eyes filled with tears to observe a vibrantly colored glass figurine resting on the floor where Isa had stood.. To an observer, it would have appeared to be nothing more than a glass figurine, beautiful but simply glass. Serena knew the truth. In it held the essence of her caring, loving surrogate mother who loved her like her own. And ever so slowly, a single silver tear made it's lonesome journey down the angel's face. The remaining wall that she had built to protect against this moment crumbled like those of Jericho. Isa had gone back to where she had come from, Serena's heart. Despite being Isa's creator, Serena knew that Isa had evolved past her original creation. Serena had given her life, and Isa gave her hope. Isa's final words slammed into her heart. _"True love shall never die." _

"I hope you are right, Isa. I honestly do."

Serena then wrapped the small figurine in a blanket, and continued to pack away the rest of her personal belongings.

* * *

Exactly an hour after she had given the command, the Generals and Serena met in the front of the manor. Five suitcases sat at their feet, a SUV was parked in front of them, the manor doors shut quietly behind them.

Jedeite took one glance at the solemn group that he was with. He knew why the silence permeated the normally playful group. He felt it his fault, and decided to do dome damage control.

"I think I know what I will miss most," he said to the dreary group. "Free room service and housekeeping." He grinned at the incredulous looks thrown his way.

"Well, I know who's riding on the roof," came Serena's surprisingly playful voice. Jedeite grinned at his Princess and threw her a wink. Her laugh was infectious and the Generals joined in on the chuckles.

"Now, now, Jed. We know you're desperate, but no hitting on Sereni-a," Nephrite joined in the banter, catching himself before he called Serena Serenity. "You'll just have to wait and see if you can get your woman back into your bed."

At Jedeite's blush, Kunzite joined in on the roast. "Zoi, you think he's in any hot water?"

"Only if my Aquatic goddess teams up with Mars. I, however, should have her plenty occupied though, so you needn't worry, Jed," Zoicite joined in with a smirk. "You'll just have to deal with the hot part."

Serena observed the banter with amusement, as they all climbed in the car. Serena started the engine and slowly pulled out of the driveway. As the Generals continued their jabs at one another about their Senshi loves, Serena sighed in defeat. She had no right to keep them from their beloveds, which meant that she would have to face her Senshi sooner and not later. Carefully, she pulled on her facade that she had so carefully constructed since...It. With her smirk in place, she tossed a single comment over her shoulder.

"You know, Darien's going to get to you first, right?"

The surprised realization on their faces was worth saying HIS name. As she turned up the radio, she glanced in her rearview mirror. The manor had faded as a mirage does, into nothingness. It was then that she knew there was no turning back. Setsuna was right, it was time she went home and faced her friends and...It. She was strong and she was a warrior. There would be no more hiding.

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You know the drill, so I'm not going to say it! Love all!

-Kat


	4. Superior Orders

Thank you to those who reviewed, it was much appreciated. sailorstars16, you motivated me to actually get this chapter done, so a special thank you to you! Now on with the programming!

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Chapter 3: Superior Orders

The Generals were in awe at the penthouse spread before them.

Jedeite let out a low whistle and Kunzite let out a soft chuckle.

"You never do anything half-assed, do you, Sere?" Zoicite's soft voice teased.

"You know the drill, Zoi. Go big-"

"Or get out of my way," the Generals chorused.

Serena chuckled and wondered exactly how many times she had said that in the past. Determining it was too high to count, she simply shrugged her delicate shoulders and turned back to the penthouse before her.

"There's four bedrooms upstairs surrounding this room, much like an atrium. The kitchen is down the hall to your right, along with the dining area. There's a 'command center' of sorts down the hall on our left, as well as a training room. There are two bathrooms upstairs, each connecting two rooms, as well as, a shower area net to the training room. Any questions?" Serena had unconsciously adopted a regal tone as she described the penthouse for the Earthen Generals.

She smirked as she saw Jedeite jumping up and down with a hand in the air, as if he was a child in school.

"The kitchen is fully stocked, Jed," her smirk evolved into a smile as she observed his chagrined expression. She turned to her other companions. "Don't worry, you guys have an unlimited line of credit at the local grocer. Jed won't be able to eat of out of house and home."

This earned her a growl from said General. The whole group laughed at Jedeite's expense. It wasn't long before he joined in the merriment. As all giggles subsided, it was Kunzite who did the mathematics of the situation.

"Hey, Sere. Who's bunking together? 'Cause I call dibs on my own room. Have you heard Jed at night?"

"Who hasn't?" muttered Nephrite.

Serena heard Nephrite's comment and a small giggle escaped.

"No one is 'bunking together,' as you put it, Kunz. I wouldn't wish Jed's snoring on my worst enemy."

"HEY! SERE!"

"Okay, maybe my worst enemy, Jed."

"That's bett- Hey! Wait a minute! I'm not that bad." At the incredulous looks he received from his friends, he turned sheepish. "Am I?"

Another round of laughs, once again at Jedeite's expense, died down when Zoicite brought everyone's attention back to Nephrite's initial comment.

"Seriously, Sere. Four bedrooms for five people with no one bunking together? I know you're all powerful, but how do you plan to make that work?"

Serena faced her beloved's Generals.

"There's a slight flaw in your miscalculations. It's four bedrooms for FOUR people."

"WHAT!" was the unanimous reply to her declaration.

"Do I really need to spell it out for you?" When she got no response from her companions, she continued. "Four generals equals four bedrooms."

Kunzite was the first to recover.

"You're not staying here with us." It was more a statement than a question. Observing the look on his Princess's face, he sighed in exasperation. "And just how the hell are we supposed to protect you if you're not even with us!" If the situation wasn't so serious to the Generals, it could be guaranteed that another round of laughter would have consumed the group, for Kunzite's face as beginning to represent a tomato. The situation, however, was not serious to Serena, and she wasted no time in laughing at the red-faced General. The Generals stared at their Moon Princess with matching looks of frustration and anger. Unlike, Jedeite, Kunzite did not handle being laughed at during a serious situation well. This is why his next outburst was unsurprising, however, stupid it may have been.

"SERENITY! For gods sake, what the HELL is going on!"

Faster than moonlight, Serena had Kunzite against the wall, her bejeweled dagger centimeters from his head and a lithe arm against his neck.

"Where the hell do you get off talking to me like that?"

Anger and frustration has a way of clouding one's common sense. Kunzite ignored the danger of his situation and continued to let said emotions reign prevalent.

"Why are you some kinda _Princess_ who thinks she's superior to us and believes that we are her servants to do with as she will?"

His fellow Generals were slack-jawed at their commander's attitude. One thought was running through their minds, _What the HELL is he doing?_

Serena paid no mind to the mental outburst of the Terran Generals. She did, however, slowly release Kunzite from the wall. A bruise was clearly forming on his neck, and he raised a hand to tenderly rub it. She reigned in her anger and carefully placed it deep within the recesses of her mind. She slipped her ornate dagger back into its sheath, hidden on her person. Her eyes met the other three Generals before they once again met with Kunzite's. She could see the remorse in his eyes for what he said. But what is said cannot be unsaid.

"Sere, I-"

Serena cut him off with a wave of her hand.

"Don't, Commander," Serena's voice was one of power and command. "We've established that I have no royal status. I do not wish to tread on matters already closed. However, I'm only going to remind you of this once, General Kunzite. I outrank you in the battle field, especially in this lifetime. You will ALL do best to remember your training. A commander's order is never questioned. Understood?"

In unison the Generals jumped to attention and saluted their commanding officer with a fist over the heart. This was a side of Serenity that had only glimpsed but had never fully seen. She was the embodiment of an experienced commander and she glowed with authority, literally. A soft silvery glow pulsated from the Lunarian Royalty's body. Her clothes had transformed into those of a high-ranking Lunarian military official. The Generals recognized the emblem of the Earth on the breast of her tunic entwined with that of a crescent moon.

"Sere,-"

"You do not address your superior in such an informal manner, General Nephrite," Serena snapped. Her power was getting out of hand, she couldn't control it when her emotions were running rampant. She despised getting upset, it made her weak and lose control. She took a calming breath and the glow dimmed into near non-existence. She closed her eyes and when she had fully calmed down, she opened them to meet the questioning gazes of the Generals. She knew they had questions but now was not the time for answers. She had a mission, and she was a warrior. She would do what needed to be done. It was time to face It, and that started with her Senshi.

"I'm sorry, guys. It's been a tough couple of days," she raised a hand as she saw Jedeite ready to interrupt her. "I know you have questions, but now is not the time. We have a goal. A devious goddess has determined that she would interfere in my life. I'm being forced to face something I don't believe I'm ready to, but I don't have a choice. I want you to slowly infiltrate back into the Senshi's lives. In this packet, are your new places of employment. The Senshi might or might not recognize you, so be prepared for some hostililty if they do. Your jobs will bring in close contact with them, so be prepared. Also, they do not have their full memories of the Moon. That means Jedeite might need some help in wooing our local Fire Priestess."

At Serenity's joke, the Generals broke out of their stupor created by the shock of Serena's mood shifts. Soft chuckles were heard from Zoicite and Nephrite, the only two not directly attacked, in jest or otherwise, by Serena. However, Zoicite is considered the smart one for a reason.

"Where will you be living, Sere?"

"In the place were everything started, Neph."

"Huh?"

"My home."

And with that, the reluctant royalty, left the Terran Generals in their new place of residence.

"So where is she staying?"

Groans were heard from all the generals at Jedeite's question. Nephrite knocked him up side the head.

"She's staying at her house, idiot!"

"Oww, Neph, that hurt."

"Get over it you big baby."

"Lightening dolt."

"Flame retard...ant."

"Is that the best you could do? No wonder Lita alwayz beat you,"

Nephrite growled as he prepared to launch himself at the General of Fire. Unfortunately, he was held back by Kunzite. His commander turned to him and gave an order.

"Neph, why don't you start on dinner? It'll help calm you down."

"Yes, sir. Right away."

Nephrite turned to head down the hall and to the right.

"And Neph..."

"Yes, sir?"

"We'll be having a training session later. Zoicite and I plan on sparring together."

At this, a knowing smile blossomed across Nephrite's face. A bounce, noticeably appeared in his step, and he continued towards the kitchen to prepare dinner for his comrades.

Jedeite looked on noticing the abrupt change in his fellow General's step.

"What did you say to him, Kunz?"

Kunzite just smiled and turned to follow Nephrite to the kitchen and dining room.

"Seriously, Kunzite, what did you say to him?"

Kunzite continued on his way and Jedeite was at his heels. Zoicite slowly shook his head at his friends' antics. He felt like he was doing that a lot lately. With a smile he followed after the more rambunctious generals. He had a feeling, that he should just enjoy his friends antics because he had a feeling that the happy times were about to end and the...ahem...was about to the fan. As he reached the kitchen, Jedeite was cowering behind a chair as Nephrite sent him an evil smirk. He couldn't help but laugh.

* * *

Selene stretched her brilliant rays across Tokyo. She smiled down upon the place where her descendant lived. She searched for the young beauty before spotting her before a very familiar house. It was a house her young one had not entered into for the better part of two years. She adored the young blonde, the most powerful of her descendants. She continued to gaze upon her childe until she entered into said house. The light burning from inside tore at Selene's sensitive eyes. Selene was born to shine at night, and any other light bothered her divine body. She did, however, hear the cry of delight from her childe's Earthen parents. She smiled serenely, before continuing on her journey around the blue and green planet, happy that her young one had decided to return to her home.

* * *

Okay, now, I have to set some rules. I received like a 1000 hits but only 14 reviews, this won't work! So, here's the new rule, at least 10 reviews per chapter or no new chapter! Got it? okay, I'm done being all mean writer, now I'm happy writer and I love all my readers! LoL! See you guys next time!

-Kat


	5. Home Sweet Crap

AN: Okay, so this story has been on hold for the last 2 years, but I finally picked it back up tonite. I hope you all enjoy it , but please remember its been two years, my writing style is a little different this time around. Be kind please!

Disclaimer: If I owned Sailor Moon, I'd have a bigger apartment...and a dog...

**Chapter 5: Home Sweet...Crap**

_Shit_. She hated when people changed her plans on her, and _this_ would change all of her plans. _Jed?_

_Sere?_

_There's a change of plans. A BIG change. Tell the others to meet me in the park, transformed, in 30 minutes._

_Okay…Is everything alright?_

_Follow orders, General. No questions._ She sent a small, but powerful burst of energy at him to make sure that he knew she meant business. She was seriously going to have to get them to stop questioning her, but one problem at a time.

"Wasn't expecting to see you here, Raye." Walking in on a member of her former Senshi sitting with her Earthen family had rattled her. However, two years of intense training had taught her how to hide her feelings well. "Long time no see."

She was met by silence.

"Mom, is it okay if I stay here?"

"What?! Of course! You're room is exactly the way you left it. Oh! Let me take your bags upstairs." The joy and enthusiasm on her face was heartbreaking. Maybe it was a mistake not contacting her to let her know she was okay. Serena's gaze drifted back to the intense glare being sent to her by the Priestess.

"It's okay, mom. I can get them. Thank you though."

"I'll help her, Mrs. Tsukino." The first words out of the Fire Senshi's mouth and Serena knew she was going to be getting a lot of shit in about…90 seconds…if she stalled…_Susie, when I get my hands on you…_

_Calm down, Princess…_

_Setsuna?! You are in so much shit when I get my hands on you…and STOP calling me Princess, you stubborn…!_

_Control your powers, Serenity…unless you plan on exposing all your secrets to your family…and Mars._

_Dammit, Susie._ Serena concentrated on taking deep breaths while avoiding the perceptive Senshi's gaze. When she felt her powers were under her control again, she turned a brilliant, if false smile on the Priestess.

"Shall we?" Ignoring the emotions radiating off the Priestess, Serena grabbed two of her bags and headed upstairs leaving Raye to follow or stay.

* * *

"Serena wants us to meet her in the park in 20 minutes," Jedeite said from his back on the practice mat.

"Yeah right, Jed. You're just saying that so I'll stop kicking your ass."

"Seriously, Neph and she said something about plans changing. I think we might want to be there."

"Last thing we need is a pissed off Sere, again," Kunzite said from his place against the far wall, Zoicite at his side. "I think we've done that enough lately, don't you?"

There was a rousing round of affirmations before Zoicite spoke up, "Jed, did you get anything off her?"

"Nope, she's been on lock down since we left. I don't know how she got so damn good."

"She's the princess. That's all there is to it."

"Better not let her catch you calling her that, Kunzite," Nephrite piped up from beside Jedeite. "Or did you not get it last time you pissed her off." He made a slight motion to his neck, referring to the still present bruise on their leader's throat.

"She'll have to accept it some day. You can't fight destiny forever, especially when the Guardian of Time is on Fate's side."

They all lapsed into silent contemplation, considering for the umpteenth time the journey that led them to where they were, protectors to the most powerful person in the universe.

Ever the leader, "If we plan on getting there on time, we need to leave now."

"I wonder if this has something to do with the Senshi?"

"We haven't even been back 2 hours. There's no way, Jed. Despite how much you want to see your mistress."

"Like you're one to talk, Neph. Lita has had you on a leash since she kicked your ass the first time you spared."

"Zoi, you decide. Who's more whipped?"

Kunzite listened to his fellow Generals banter fade as they left the workout area. Earthen General or not, he sent a silent prayer to the Moon goddess, Selene, hoping that this would all play out with as little pain as possible. _The last thing, you're childe needs is more pain. She's been through too much already._

* * *

Serena had decided that silence? Not always golden. Especially when it comes from someone who never before had an issue with saying what was on their mind. She hated this, but she was different now, a warrior. She learned to love the silence, uncomfortable or not. Raye was in her house….well, her parents house, but still, her territory.

"So…you're back." _Even the smallest victories are sweet._

"I'm back." _ Come on, Raye. Ask the question you really want to. "Where've you been, Serena?""What were you thinking, Serena?" Come on, Raye, ask them._

"Why?"

"Does it matter? I'm back. End of story." _Not gonna accept that, are you, Raye?_

"Who the hell do you think you are?"_ Here we go._ "You disappear for two, TWO, fucking years, and you expect to waltz right back in like nothing happened? Like you didn't leave us to fight by ourselves? Like you didn't leave us to pick up the pieces of Darien's heart? His heart that you _shattered_!" _Now that's the Raye I know and love…bitch._

"I don't answer to you, Raye. I don't have to explain myself. All you need to know, Mars, is that your leader is back, and you will do as she says. No questions. If I want to explain, I will, but you don't get to badger me for answers to questions you don't have the right to ask."

Serena could feel her power swelling as her anger rose. Worse yet, Raye could feel it too. _Damn Priestess and her stupid perception. Control yourself, Moon. Focus. Breathe. Just like you practiced._ Power under control, she glanced at Raye's wide, puzzled eyes.

"I do believe you can find your way out."

Turning her back on the stunned Priestess, she considered this conversation closed and done with. Mars had a different idea though, still flabbergasted by this person masquerading as her once best friend.

"He still loves you. Even though you broke him, he still loves you."

"I doubt he will much longer," and then the conversation really was finished, and Raye left made her exit quietly.

* * *

Despite the tears still drying on her cheeks, Serena was early to meet the Generals. _Misery does wonders for time management_. She silently rolled her dagger between her hands, contemplating…everything.

"Serentity."

Serena looked up to find the Generals bowing, fist over their hearts, in front of her. She heaved a sigh.

"Nice to see you guys actually getting that I'm your boss." Serena tried to laugh off the fact that they caught her crying, trying not to drown in her misery.

"Sere, what's going on? We haven't even been back a night and you're already calling emergency meetings? Not to mention, you're…well…"he made an all encompassing motion. The tears were pulling at Kunzite's heart, but it was the soft silver glow pulsating around Serena that bothered him. _Something bad has happened._ Meeting Jedeite's eyes confirmed his suspicions. _Something really really bad._

Serena could feel the suffocating concern coming from the guys. "Well this wasn't what I had planned. I was going to have you guys slowly infiltrate into the Senshi's lives, slowly earning their trust, but unfortunately our covers been blown. Well, mine at least."

Serena heaved a sigh as she met each General's eyes, appreciating and despising the concern so evident in their eyes.

"Raye was at my parent's house when I got there."

"Oh…damn." _Couldn't have said it better myself, Nephrite._

"Yeah, damn. So the rest of the Senshi probably know by now that I'm back so it won't be long before they find out about you guys." _You can do this Serenity._ "So we're taking control of the situation. I can almost guarantee that the Senshi will be showing up at the Temple within the next 5 minutes. Why don't we go pay them a visit?"

"No more hiding, Serenity?"

"No more hiding, Zoicite."

* * *

"She's back?"

"She's back," Raye confirmed. She could see the shock on her fellow Senshi's faces, it was no doubt the same look on her face when Serena walked through the front door of the Tsukino house. "She's not the same. She's…different. I can't put my finger on it. She's colder, more distant. But there's something else, she radiates…something…" _Power_, the thought came unbidden to her brain. "She's not our Serena anymore."

"Did she explain? Did she say where she went? _Why_ she LEFT?" Mina's outrage was filtering into her voice. It exceeded in response to Raye's indication that no, Serena hadn't explained. However, Amy interrupted Mina's next outburst.

"Did you tell Darien?"

"I couldn't. Not over the phone. He's on his way over, I was going to tell him when he got here." Amy nodded in acceptance that this was the right course of action. Darien would need them when he found out the love of his life was back in Tokyo.

"Who the FUCK does she think she is?"

"You're leader, Lita. And I don't appreciate that tone."

All four Senshi whirled around to find Serena standing in the entrance to the room with four men at her back.

"You would do well to remember that."

"Serena?"

_Oh god, Luna._

"You really are back." Serena could see her Guardian fighting with her emotions. "Where have you been, Serena? We've needed you how could you leave us like that? All alone? No explanation? How?"

Hearing the sorrow in Luna's voice, Serena throat tightened.

_I can't do this. I can't do this. I can't do this…_

It was Kunzite who shook her, quite literally, from her thoughts, "Serenity! Stop this! Control yourself!"

She breathed deeply gaining control once again over her volatile emotions. Using Kunzite's grip on her forearms as an anchor, the stupid glow that always flared when she was out of control faded into nothing. She stretched her stiff fingers from the fists they had involuntarily curled into. _Stupid mood swings. Stupid goddamn powers. Stupid, stupid, stupid._

_Focus._

She could hear Setsuna's voice in her head.

_If you will it, it will happen. Control. Focus._

Remembering all her hard work, all the lessons she learned in the past two years, Serenity calmed down enough to open her eyes and wished she hadn't. Over Kunzite's shoulders she met the indigo eyes of the one person she wanted to hide from forever. His name was a whisper on her lips.

"Darien…"

"Serena?"

_Oh shit._

* * *

I hope you all enjoyed this! If you still like it I'll keep writing. Just let me know!


	6. Focus

**UPDATE:** Question, dear readers, do you all want semi-daily short chapters like this? Or would you perfer longer, weekly chapters? Let me know!

AN: Okay, so I messed up with the last chapter. I called it Chapter 5 and it really should have been Chapter 4. I beg you forgiveness dear readers. I loved that some many of you enjoyed the story even though its been 2 YEARS since I last focused on it. Lovin' the love, KEEP IT UP! Now again, I beg your indulgence, there might be some inconsistency between what I had before and what I have now, I'm a little rusty on my SM and I've changed in the last 2 years, I'm in a completely different spot in my life and I feel my writing reflects that. That being said, I'm staying as true as I can to my original vision for this story. I'm not a planner when it comes to writing, I know where I _want_ to go, but I feel writing is organic so I never set anything in stone. As I write, characters and plots evolve and change, so I can't tell you how long this story will be or where its going to end up, but I know its going to be a roller coaster ride. Fun, crazy, and full of twisting turns. Maybe even a loop or two. LoL. So enjoy this short chapter (sorry!) and please keep the reviews coming. I crave input!! good or bad. If there's some bog inconsistency, PLEASE TELL ME!! I'm a ridiculous perfectionist! Thats why I rarely proofread, I find mistakes and start changing plots and sentences and then BAM! Two years have gone by and I haven't touched this story. So to avoid another major lapse of time between chapters, please help me! Okay...now on with the story...I say no more...

DISCLAIMER: Me no ownie

**Chapter 5:** **Focus**

There are some things in the universe that suck no matter what. Running into the love of your life after not having seen him in two years is one of them, especially, if you didn't exactly give him an explanation or a goodbye for that matter. Want to know what's worse? Seeing him for the first time in two years while your Lunarian powers are running rampant AND you're in the arms, even platonically, of another man.

"Serena? Wha-? You-?" The range of emotions on Darien's face was heartbreaking, but it was the shadows in his eyes, the dark circles under his eyes that drove into the depths of her soul that she thought she had walked away.

_Oh goddess! I shouldn't have come back. I'm doing more damage._ Too caught up in her thoughts, Serena didn't even notice the change in Darien's posture. The hardening eyes, the curled fist. It wasn't until she stumbled as Darien ripped Kunzite away from her that she realized what was going on.

"Darein! No! You don't understand, it's not what you think!" Trying desperately to figure out away to do some damage control, Serena watched helplessly as the Terran Prince loomed over his once second-in command. _Think, Serenity! You're supposed to be in control, fix this!_

Kunzite scrambled to his feet, keeping a healthy distance between him and his Prince. He recognized the look in Darien's eyes, he'd seen it often in battle and wasn't in the best shape to take on an enraged royal today…again.

"Darien, don't do this. Listen to her, let her explain; then you can decide if you want to…well…whatever. Just let's act like the warriors we all are." Kunzite and Serena both sent silent thank you's to Zoicite for keeping such a calm head.

"Whose says we want to hear what she has to say?" _Crap…forgot about the Senshi_. Serena spared a glance for the Love Senshi behind her. _I need to stop this. It has to stop._

"You want to hear this…if you value your mission at all. Don't you want to know about the Princess? The crystal? Our pasts?" _Smart move, Sere. Play the duty card._

No sooner were the words out of her mouth, than pandemonium erupted in a never ending wave. The Senshi were yelling at her, the Generals jumped to her defense, but her eyes never left Darien's. The heartbreak, the confusion, the utter lack of everything that made him _Darien_ was missing. _I did this. I caused this. This was a mistake, no amount of explanation will justify what I did. What It did. My fault. Again._

It happened so quick she didn't even know what was happening till it was over. She could tell her eyes were the stormy grey they were whenever she reached this point. The wave of power had diminished to the soft glow that normally surrounded her…if you paid close enough attention.

The Senshi were silently watching her in an attitude that could only be described as abject astonishment. The Generals were on their knees, heads bent, fist across their hearts, yet it was Darien who still held her attention. _Please, Darien. Look at me._ However, when those midnight blue eyes met hers she saw what she feared he would see. Endymion was shining in those fathomless depths, but Darien's expression was a war of emotions.

"Darien?" She feared his answer.

"Princess," his voice was flat as he appraised her with new knowledge. _He's remembered._

* * *

Darien couldn't comprehend what was going on. Raye had called him with urgent news, but he arrived to find Serena, the love of his life, in the arms of some guy. His fist clenched involuntarily as he saw this _person_ try to comfort Serena as she obviously tried to control her emotions. Something was going on, and he had a feeling it was going to change everything.

_Oh my goddess_. Nothing prepared him for what he saw when Serena's gaze raised to meet his. Her beautiful cerulean eyes were a grey that could only be described as thunderous, yet in those depths he saw his Serena. Through the pain, the heartache, the imposed distance, he saw her, saw her love.

He heard her whisper his name, but it roared in his ears like a shout across the vastness between them. Two years. She'd been gone two. Two _YEARS_. And now there was this guy. The guy was on the ground beneath before he could comprehend anything else. This guy had his hands on _his_ Serena.

He vaguely registered one of the other bastards with her trying to reason with him…he even knew his name. He distantly heard Serena speaking and then nothing. He didn't know when it happened, but he was staring into those steel eyes of his beloved and nothing else mattered.

Then it hit him. Something hit him, memories of a distant life. He finally registered the second presence in his mind, that voice that guided him when it came to saving Sailor Moon. Not Sailor Moon, no, the Princess. _Serenity_, it whispered to him.

Her eyes were wide, the cerulean slowly slipped in, blending with that bitter grey, as she reigned in her power. _She's not the same_, the voice whispered. _She's not entirely Serena anymore, but she's not completely Serenity either. Something's happened to her. We didn't protect here well enough._

"Darien?" his name floated across the distance. He could read the fear in her voice. She knew that he knew, and it terrified her. _Why?_ He ignored the voice.

"Princess."

* * *

I need the love! Read and Review! Good, Bad, and the slightly insane! Or the totally insane! I don't care! Push the button! Type the words!


	7. Decisions Decisions

AN: Lovin' the Love, but I wan more!! What can I say...I'm an inherently greedy author. Sue me! Actually, don't...I don't want to deal with the paper work. LOL. How about this...everyone who has an alert on this story just leave me a thumbs up or down that way I know if I'm doing good. Sound good? K, great.

Disclaimer: Do I really need to put this on every chapter? Seriously! Everyone knows I have no claime so really...is it necessary after the first?

**Chapter 6: Decisions Decisions**

"Listen."

It was soft, but the command in Serena's voice was undeniable. Her expression softened as she met the eyes of her Guardians, yet it was the look in Darien's eyes, the piercing awareness, that drove her deeper. "Please. I can't…I won't keep you guys in the dark, not if this is what's going to happen. Fighting. Yelling. You deserve the right to choose if you want me to stay." Noticing Nephrite's intention to interrupt, Serena dismissed him with a wave of her hand. "You ALL deserve to know what happened. I can't keep hiding. We need to be unified. Susie didn't force me home unless something big was going to happen soon."

She saw the Senshi lock eyes in silent communication, but Luna made the decision for them. "We'll meet you inside."

Serena shook her head in disagreement.

"No, Luna. You can't make their decision for them. They each need to make it for themselves. I'll leave you guys here." Sending a pointed look towards the Generals, she emphasized, "_All_ of you, so you can think. Meet me in the rose garden in the park in an hour."

Serena didn't give them a chance to argue. She just turned and left them with their thoughts.

Silence prevailed over the Temple after Serena's exit, yet it was Jedeite who broke the stillness.

"We're going to meet her, right?"

"Of course." Darien's voice left no room for argument by the Generals. "You have a lot to atone for, and you will not deny Serenity her chance to explain."

That Darien knew of the General's past life behavior shocked none of his Guardians, but the undeniable curiosity of the Senshi dominated any other acknowledgement of Darien's new knowledge.

"Who are you guys?" The question came from Lita, but it was reflected on all of their faces.

Surprisingly, Luna spoke before any of the males did. "They are the Terran Generals, guardians of the Prince of Earth, your counterparts."

The black cat gave no mention of it, but the knowledge shining in her eyes told the Generals that she knew exactly who they were and what they had done on the moon. "They are not the issue right now. You need to heed Serena's wishes. Do you want to meet her and find out what drove her to leave us? Do you want an explanation? I cannot comprehend that she left without good reason. Despite what you say, Raye, Serena never shirked her responsibility as a Senshi." She continued before Raye could rise to the accusation, "Now is not the time to argue, Mars. Now is the time for you to think, but I do think you should decide as a team."

"I think we need to hear her out," Ami voiced softly.

"Why? There is no reason for abandoning us like that! Do you remember what it was like? Do you remember how you felt when she left?"

"Raye…you don't know for sure. She could have a good reason. We don't know."

"Don't defend her, Mina! She LEFT!"

"I don't think she can make an excuse for this. Raye's right. She left. No explanation. No warning."

"Lita!"

"No, Mina. She left. She didn't even let us know if she was still alive!"

As the Senshi fought, Darien motioned to his Generals to follow him. _We need to have a discussion._

* * *

Zoicite watched his Prince with cautious eyes as he paced the small clearing they had relocated to. He knew his fellow generals were doing the same, but he couldn't help but let his mind wander to the last time he'd seen the Prince this agitated. He wasn't so much agitated as he was raging a war between two possible decisions. The last time had been on Earth as he battled with the notion of sneaking onto the Moon to see Serenity at the ball, the night that everything turned to disaster. Beryl had brainwashed them, forced them to terminate their loves, the Senshi, Amy. She forced them to break their oath to the Prince to always be loyal to him, and him alone. She destroyed everything. Even the trust that once inseparably bound the five friends.

"You're not evil." The Prince's soft, strained statement broke Zoicite's trip down hell lane. He instinctively differed to Kunzite to answer the Prince's non-question. Despite their earlier battle, Kunzite had always been closer to the Prince, and now that the Prince wasn't being blinded by jealousy or anger…or both, Kunz would be the best person to deal with the Prince-incarnate.

* * *

"We are now and forever your loyal guardians and friends, Endymion." Kunzite dropped to his knee in a show of subservience to the Prince. The other Generals were milliseconds behind him, all kneeling in respect to their lord.

"It is a different time, my Guards," Darien said, moving to stand in front of Kunzite. He grasped Kunzite's forearm and raised him to a standing position. "And I am no longer the Terran Prince. It's Darien. Many things have changed, my friends."

Jedeite rose from his kneeling position with his fellow Generals. He couldn't help but reach out to probe his Prince's psyche, trying to find a reason for the lack of anger that was so prevalent not minutes ago at the Temple. He could see it simmering under the surface, but it was being overridden by an overwhelming sense of worry. _For Serena_.

Jedeite found that the psyche of the Prince matched that of Serena's and his fellow Generals. It was on rare occasion that he glimpsed her mind, but the duality that was so singular fascinated him. He believed that it had to with not only being incarnated, but also having their memories of their previous lives. He wouldn't lie. He checked the Senshi, they didn't have the duality…yet. His only exception was Raye. The Fiery Priestess' predisposed perception to all things psychic prevented him from delving too deeply into her mind. Her natural psychic walls had always been one of things that attracted him to her. He always loved a challenge. Seeing her again was…hard, yet considering his last memory of her was of his sword sliding through her back, he preferred the non-recognition of their encounter at the Temple.

* * *

"I want you to tell me what happened."

There was no question as to what the Prince was referring to. Unfortunately, none of the Generals had answer for the Prince, least of all, Nephrite, who was not the resident psychic like Jedeite was. Despite the attention demanded of this situation, he couldn't help but let a part of his attention, and heart, drift back along the path to where Lita was standing. She looked fierce as always, ready to battle those who threatened her friends, even if it was someone who once held her eternal oath of allegiance. _This whole situation is a mess_.

"We don't know, my lor-Darien. She never told us and we never pushed it…much."

* * *

Kunzite tried to find the words to explain to his Prince what had occurred over the last 18 months.

"She found us about 18 months ago. We were all struggling with this onslaught of memories that had been occurring over the previous 6 month, the guilt brought with them. We don't what triggered them, but I think she does. She apologized to us for them. We knew you were here, somewhere, but she refused to tell us where you were. She wasn't ready to let the chance of anyone finding her happen. How could we deny her anything? She was the Princess…_your _Princess. She told us we could leave that we didn't need to stay with her, she didn't a _want_ us to stay with her, but we out stubborned her and we've stayed with her since then. We learned slowly over the years what her life was like in Tokyo."

Kunzite sighed as he slowed his explanation. The look in the Prince's eye was a knowing one, he knew exactly how stubborn Serena could be when she wanted to be.

"She never told us what happened to make her flee Tokyo. We assumed it was some Big Bad…it was only recently that we realized that she was hiding from the Senshi…and you." Kunzite said the last part reluctantly, not sure how Darien was going to take the news.

"Thank you." That was definitely not the reaction he was expecting and it must have shown on his face. "For staying with her and for protecting her…even if it was from me." This was definitely not the way Kunzite had expected this little gathering to go. He expected an enraged Prince and lots of groveling on the part of the Generals, coupled with eternal oaths of loyalty…again.

"Not needed, Darien. There was never another option. She's different. Even we can see that. She's been training so hard over the past two years, she almost has control over all her powers, but…I can't put my finger on it. The push behind it…I don't know, something is pushing her to become the perfect warrior," he gave a soft laugh. "She can kick all our asses and barely break a sweat, yet she still pushes for more strength, more control. She's not the Princess she was on the Moon."

Darien nodded. This discussion was finished for the time being. It was time to meet Serena and get the rest of the story. He only hoped that when all was said and done, they would make it through relatively unscathed. Something had caused his love to hide from the people who were supposed to be her closest confidants, something he could already tell would change them all…it had already changed Serena, and he wasn't sure if it was a good change or bad.

* * *

AN2: Question? Anyone have any guesses as to what happened to Serena? _I_ know what happens, but I was just wondering what you guys are imagining happened. Let me know.

Please?


	8. Now You Know

AN: You guys are soo lucky. I had nothign to do today at work so I wrote the BIG chapter. Keep reading to find out what went down with Serena. I expect a SERIOUS amount of reviews for this chapter, plus you guys got two chapters in one day.

**Chapter 7: Now You Know**

_Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid mood swings. Stupid Lunarian Powers. Stupid Guardian of Time. Stupid Stupid. Stupid._

Serena couldn't help but pace the small sanctuary as she waited for the Senshi and the Generals to make their decisions. She knew Darien would come; he needed an answer, closure if you will. She couldn't believe that she let Pluto manipulate her into this situation. She hated not having control over her life, she worked so hard over the last two years to stay away, to keep them from being involved. They died for her in one lifetime, she didn't want them to die again, because this time they wouldn't die for her, they would die because of her.

_I said an hour. They shouldn't be much longer…if they're coming. Do I even want them to come? It would be so easy to just slip away and disappear again. _But Serena knew that if she left this time, she wouldn't be able to tell herself that her intentions were noble. She would just be a coward. If the last two years of training taught her anything, it was that warriors are not cowards. If she wanted to be honest, she needed to face It.

"Serena?"

_Luna_.

"Are you, um, okay, Serena?"

Serena couldn't help but let a small smile slip through at her guardian's hesitance around her.

"I'm the best that I can be given the situation, Luna, but I'm far from okay." Serena hesitated herself and hated herself for it. She was a warrior, a commander on the battlefield, she didn't hesitate. It would cost a life or hundred. "Are they coming?" She didn't specify. She knew Luna would know to whom she was referring.

"They were split to come or not. I pray to the goddess that they're curiosity will prevail over their pain," she paused, trying to find the words to explain to her charge what had happened to the Senshi over the last two years. "They do love you…still. They're just angry and hurt. The one constant in their lives disappeared and they were left alone to defend a city. How could they heal each other if they're own hearts were broken? So yes, they're angry, but they will come."

"_Amor sangra la ira y dolió_," muttered Serena softly in response to Luna's tirade.

"What, Serena?"

"Nothing, Luna. Just something someone I knew would say in this situation." Serena sighed and continued her pacing of the secluded garden.

"Serena."

Her head snapped up at the sound of his voice. The generals were at his back, eerily similar to how they were at her's when she first arrived at the Temple. She quickly appraised all the Generals for signs of damage, but besides the still lingering bruise on Kunzite's neck, they seemed relatively unharmed.

Her eyes strayed back to the bruise. She could've healed immediately after their…well, argument, but she wanted him to understand that she wasn't a Princess anymore, and she could hurt him…easily. Serena sighed softly. She knew she was avoiding Darien's steady gaze and was trying to distract her mind from what was about to happen. Her greatest transgression laid out for all to see.

The insignificant flick of her wrist was enough for the bruise to heal, but it was enough for Darien to notice. Or maybe he just felt the power flow past him to the General standing to his right. It took one glance to see the product of the power. The bruise was gone.

"You can heal people." It was a statement. One she wish he hadn't made.

"Among other things," she dismissed him and resumed her pacing. The Senshi were going to be late if they decided to show. _58 minutes_. The countdown had been going silently in her head, but was interrupted by his voice.

"You couldn't do that on the moon. Not without the crystal."

"This isn't the moon, Darien. If you recall, there was no Sailor Moon then either."

He fell silent as he silently appraised the young women in front of him. _She's different_.

"So then who are you really, Serena? A lie?"

Serena spun around to face the Senshi as they enter the once spacious garden, now it was beginning to feel as if the walls were closing in on her. She could feel Kunzite by her side as she tried to fight the panic attack.

_They came._ _They want to know_.

"_I'm fine, Kunz. It caught me off guard. I wasn't expecting them to show up, at least not all of them. Go back to Darien_," she spoke softly to his mind. He caught her eye and read the command in them. A stiff nod and he was back to where he was before, behind Darien.

"Are you really the Princess? Have you been who we were searching for all along?"

"I'm not a Princess, Mina. The Lunarian Princess hasn't existed for over a thousand years. I just happen to be her reincarnated form, but I'm no royalty." She took a deep breath. "Please get comfortable. There is a lot you all don't know."

She waited for everyone to get settled on various benches and patches of grass. She resumed her pacing remaining silent, trying to find the best place to start.

"Well?" Raye's impatient voice rose from the silence. Serena stopped and faced her audience.

"I should start with Beryl. Please don't interrupt," she cut off Raye's next comment. "Once I start, if I stop…"

Darien finished her sentence for her, "You won't be able to finish?"

She nodded in affirmation. Taking a cleansing breath like Susie taught her, she delved into her memories.

"You know we defeated her. You know we found the Crystal, but you all lost a lot of memories in that final battle. I think that was my fault. When I destroyed her with the Crystal it granted me a wish. I wished you all wouldn't be burdened with the past. The Silver Crystal interpreted that by removing your memories of the moon. You still knew you were Senshi, that we were friends, that we…loved each other, but you didn't remember your previous lives. Any of you." She threw a nervous glance towards Darien before continuing her story.

"Darien and I still dated as you know, but without the memories of being Serenity and Endymion. We were just Serena and DArien, not starcrossed lovers who had died a thousand years ago."

"Okay, so we know now why we don't remember a life that you do. Why'd you leave? That's not your excuse-"

Growing impatient with the Fire Senshi's complete disregard, her Lunarian powers sent a wave of power that silenced the Martian princess mid sentence.

"I have no excuse Raye, except that I thought I would be protecting you all by leaving." The Senshi's response was caught short be the pain in Serena's eyes as she willed herself to continue to…It.

"It was about two years ago. I couldn't concentrate on my homework. You were all busy, so I knew I couldn't procrastinate that way. So I came here to this garden under the guise of doing my homework in the sunshine. Hoping the change of scenery would help settle my mind. I was struggling for weeks with offering you the opportunity to regain your memories, but I couldn't make myself do it. I didn't want to add that burden to you guys…" Serena delved even further into the blackness that was that day.

_Goddess…help me do this. I can't tell them this…it's too much…_

Serena steeled herself to continue her story, but something else happened. She felt the power well up in her before she could stop it.

_No…_

The garden changed. It was no longer dark, it was a sunny day, and a sixteen year old Serena was laying on a blanket with books and notebooks spread in front of her. She gnawed on the end of her pencil as she contemplated the Algebra problem on the worksheet. She knew Amy could help her, but she was busy and Serena wanted to do this on her own. So lost in her thoughts was she that she didn't notice the group that entered the garden.

"Please don't," she heard a small voice whimper. She glanced up to see a girl, younger than she was, being herded into the garden. They didn't see her by one of the bushes and she quietly arranged herself in a crouch, sheltered by the rose bush she'd been lying next to.

"I promise I won't say anything, just please let me go," Serena's fist clinched in anger at the prospect of harm coming to this girl, she was too young.

The men were surrounding the girl, snickering and leering at her futile attempts to get away from them. Before her mind could catch up, she spoke, rising from her shelter, "Leave her alone."

They were all momentarily shocked at the presence of another person in the secluded sanctuary, but the lecherous grin turned towards her. She kept her eyes on him as she moved towards the girl and placed herself between him and her. There was something in his eyes that caused the hairs on her neck to stand up. So engrossed in keeping her eyes on him, she didn't notice when one of the other men grabbed the girl, a knife at her throat. Malicious laughing surrounded in stereo as she realized what just happened.

"Let her go," she addressed the leader, her eyes straying to the jeweled dagger that suddenly appeared in his hand. "This doesn't need to happen." _Oh goddess, why didn't I transform first. Shit. Shit. Shit._

"You think you're gonna play hero, little girl?" the lecherous grin widened. "I really don't think you're in a position to make any demands, Blondie."

Again a chorus of malevolent chuckles circled around her. Serena was trying so hard to figure out how to get the girl away from the men. She was Sailor frickin' Moon for crying out loud, but she wasn't Sailor Moon right now, she was just Serena. _Fuck_.

"I'll make you a deal, Blondie. You wanna be a hero? Well heroes make choices. Now choose, you or her?"

_What? Me or her?_

"You can sacrifice yourself, Blondie, or you can watch her go first," her eyes wouldn't leave the jeweled dagger twirled between his fingers. She was confused.

_Sacrifice myself? Wha-?_ Movement caught her eye as the man holding the girl moved his hand up over the girl's shirt and back down to her skirt, dipping inside.

_I think I'm going to be sick_. _I wish they would all just go away…_

"CHOOSE, Damn it! YOU or HER!" Serena's gaze was reluctantly returned to the leader, who was now inches from her. She flinched as he started to run the tip of the dagger up her arm and across her collar. Anger was clearly taking control of his temper and he was losing control. She needed to figure out what to do. It hadn't even been a few minutes since she had stood up and now she held the life and innocence of another person in her hands. _Innocent. Sailor Moon protects the innocent…_

"You won't choose? Fine! I will. I choose-" but he never got to choose, neither did she. A blindingly, brilliant light filled the garden. She couldn't see anything of resembling the scene moments ago. The Silver Crystal was spinning slowly in front of her.

A soft voice could be heard, "Wish granted, Princess." And then there was nothing.

The garden shifted again back to night, but young Serena was still there, collapsed in unconsciousness. The only reference to the early encounter was the jeweled dagger laying by her side. She too faded into nothingness as the garden shifted back to the present. The vision was done.

Tears streamed down her face as Serena continued her earlier narration; she kept her eyes on the dagger in her hands. She didn't remember when she pulled it from its hiding spot, but it was twirling in her hands as if it had a life of it's own. "I woke to nothing. It was as if they were never there. I looked for any sign, but they were all gone, even the girl. I couldn't make a decision fast enough, so the crystal took control. It answered my unconscious wish. They all went away. Permanently. I ended the lives of five people that night because I couldn't make the sacrifice. Me for an innocent. When I realized what happened I ran. I couldn't face you all knowing that the person who was supposed to stand for love and justice, who was supposed to be the Princess, was no better than a murderer. It took me a few days to figure out what happened to the crystal, it had disappeared from my brooch."

Serena pushed the strap of her tank top down to expose the skin over her heart. Two harsh lines intersected immediately over her heart.

"It became a part of its Princess. It didn't trust me to make my decisions, so it took over, bonding with my body. It's taken me two years to try to regain control over the powers the crystal brought to my body. The crystal can be so wild and unpredictable…" She trailed off not quite sure to explain the lack of control she felt over her own body at times. Things that happen before her mind can process what's going to happen.

"As of that day Sailor Moon and the Princess ceased to exist, everything that they stood for and fought for, I, Serena, had betrayed. I couldn't stay and risk the same thing happening to more innocents." She met the eyes of the Generals individually before she continued, the sympathy and pity evident tore at her pride as she continued, "The power released by the Crystal woke the memories of the Generals. It was several months before I realized that, but as soon as I did, I sought them out and brought them back to where I was so that I could explain what was going on. They ended up staying with me, despite my protests, but they said they needed to train. I think they were scared I was going to off myself…I thought about it, but the crystal wouldn't let me…Pluto came to me about two months after I left. She offered to help train me, to help me gain control over my powers and the crystal."

Serena gathered all her courage and finally met the eyes of the Senshi, Luna, and finally, Darien, all in turn. There was anger, confusion, sympathy, and surprisingly, love, radiating in various combinations in all of them.

She heaved a sigh, dropping her gaze back to the dagger, the only thing left from that fateful night.

"So now you know."


	9. Now What?

At least it wasn't TWO years! That's all I gotta say in my defense. Well, that and I got stuck…again. Where do you go once you make the big reveal? The thorn in every author's side…well, that and life and crazy things like a job and bills that need to be paid…where was I? Oh yeah! My story. This is going to be third try to finish this story…let's see how it goes…maybe I'll get it done BEFORE the world ends…who knows…

Disclaimer: If I owned anything, this would've been made into a live action movie, not Dragon Ball Z…and it would've been finished awhile ago since I would've had lots 'o moolah and no job, at least not a real job that distracts me.

* * *

**Chapter 8: Now What?**

_Run, RUN. Look at the horror on their faces, the anger. You hurt them, just like you hurt the innocent. You're always hurting people. RUN!_

She ignored the voice screaming at her to choose the flight option in the fight or flight response. She was done running, thanks to that stubborn, manipulative deity some referred to as a goddess.

_You left before, you can do it again. You were protecting them. Do you think anything has changed? You're still out of control. Remember the bruise on Kunz._

Her eyes flicked to the unmarred neck of the Terran General.

_Remember the look on that little, girl's face._

Her jaw clenched as the face flashed in her mind's eye, a huanting reminder. She wanted to ignore this voice, but it was growing louder and more difficult to muffle.

She was a warrior. She wasn't going to run.

_Yeah, but what's a warriors job…hmm?_

Unwittingly, she responded. _To protect._

_You mean, to kill. To destroy._

_NO! To protect those who can't protect themselves! _She defended automatically.

_And how do you do that? Talk to the big bad? Give them a spanking? No you eliminate them. Permanently._

She screamed internally in frustration. She hated this inner voice. It was a plague upon her. And it was getting more sarcastic. She threw up another shield, another brick wall in her mind. She wasn't going to listen.

The dagger had warmed to her touch. She lowered her eyes from those around her and focused on the small reflections created from the dying sun.

She waited.

Ball meet court. Their side.

She had just bared her deepest, darkest, most unforgiveable sin to those who mattered most. The least they could do is break the silence. She had done enough. Plus, She was exhausted. Emotionally, mentally, even physically, but she remained standing. With the crystal imbedded in her body, she was near invincible, but she was still just a girl. A reincarnated Lunarian royal with out of control superpowers and some SERIIOUS baggage, but still…just a girl.

So she waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And then she remembered. She was supposed to be the leader. They were waiting on her…or they were still in shock. Either way, it was her responsibility to lead this situation.

"Go home," her voice was hoarse but still commanding. "Think about it all. You're in shock. You'll know where I'll be when you're ready."

And she walked away.

* * *

What do you think? Am I going in the right direction or should we send this baby to the scrape yard?

-Kat


End file.
